Saturday, March 19, 2011

Why Shakespeare Couldn't Email

Once while Shakespeare was at the computer--yes, he had a computer--he had a case of writer's block. Wasting time, he took apart his keyboard and put it back together. What he didn't realize was that he had switched the A and E keys. This is the madness that ensued:

To ba or not to ba: Thet is tha quastion.
Whathar 'tis noblar in tha mind to suffar
Tha slings and errows of outregaous fortuna...

Then he spied the word "fortuna" and nearly had a stroka... er, stroke. Something wasn't right. Perhaps if he moved a few keys around...

Ir ti take arms against a sea if tribles...

"Tribles?" he said. "What in the name of Lady Macbeth's bloody hands is a 'Trible'?" One "B" and a few episodes of Star Trek later, old Willy switched all the keys back to their correct places. Or, so he thought.

And by @$$@#ng *nd th*m? T@ d#*: t@ sl**p;
N@ m@r*; and by a sl**p t@ s*y w* *nd

He swore and switched back to parchment and quill, for 'tis nobler in a bind to suffer not the keys and arrows of outrageous technology.

The End.


  1. I think I know where Will is coming from. Give me a quill rather than this computer any day. And if this comment gets through to you, I had better eat my words.

  2. Oops! They were rather chewy and not at all tasty!

  3. Yay, Dizzy! You were able to post :-D

    Would you like some sugar with those words?


  4. Thanks, Elena! And congrats again on your wonderful news :-D